Don't zoom on the faces. Just don't!

@TheComedyCentre

Women are going through a lot ❤️

@TheComedyCentre

Things that can only happen in Nigeria!

A man will have unprotected sex with a girl he just met at the club, get in his car and put on his seatbelt like he didn't just try to kill himself a minute ago!

@TheComedyCentre

Dad : Who do you like more, mum or me?

Son : Both

Dad : Okay, if I go to Malaysia and your mum goes to Dubai , where will you go?

Son : Dubai

Dad : That shows you love your mum more?

Son : No, it shows I love Dubai more than Malaysia

Dad : Okay, if I go to Dubai and your mum goes to Malaysia , where will you go?

Son : Malaysia

Dad : Replied angrily, why?

Son : why the anger, I chose Malaysia because I have been to Dubai before

Dad : When did you go to Dubai ?

Son : During the first question

@TheComedyCentre

A good woman will stay by your side no matter how much you lie, cheat, or steal.

That woman is your mother, not your wife so drop your bad habits and treat your wife right!

#WordForTheDay

@TheComedyCentre

My alarm sound is a lullaby because I hate loud music that disturbs my sleep!

@TheComedyCentre

Am so glad you ruined my life?

Rehearsal won't have been able to fix this issue, they need to report themselves to the nearest police station 😂

@TheComedyCentre

Stupid dogs 😂

@TheComedyCentre

People with annoying questions sometimes

Friend : is she your sister?
Me : yes
Friend : is it by blood?
Me : no is by hollandia yoghurt

@TheComedyCentre

WhatsApp is mad 😂

@TheComedyCentre

I remember when I bought condoms and I said to the attendant “have a good night“ and she said “oh thank you. Have a... never mind you already gonna have a good night“

@TheComedyCentre

Pump 5 is closed due to fuel spill.

Manager: Don't worry Angela has it under control!

Angela has a death wish apparently!

@TheComedyCentre

Did you know 14 years ago today programmer Laszlo Hanyecz traded 10,000 BTC for two Papa John's Pizzas. Let's celebrate together how far crypto has come.

If he had kept it, that would be worth almost $700,000,000 today.

#DidYouKnow

@TheComedyCentre

Why would someone think of eating the carpet in the first place?

@TheComedyCentre

Boy (aged 4): Dad, I've decided to get married

Dad: Wonderful, do you have a girl in mind?

Boy: Yes, grandma! She said she loves me, I love her too and she's the best cook and story teller in the whole world!

Dad: That's nice, but we have a small problem there!

Boy: What problem?

Dad: She happens to be my mother. How can you marry my mother!?

Boy: Why not?! You married mine!

@TheComedyCentre

If you sleep walk or knows someone that sleep walks, watch this before bed!

@TheComedyCentre

Doctors are just educated drug lords and Pharmacists are just educated drug dealers!

@TheComedyCentre

💬 Who are you?